i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
