She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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