YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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