Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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