I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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