whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Randomize