Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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