My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
