So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
