he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
