My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
