I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize