So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize
