i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
