Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i think i have two assholes
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
