dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
