I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
