This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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