Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
