lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Sober January is a disaster.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
