I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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