Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
