Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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