I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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