I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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