Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
