I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
