She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
