Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
