Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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