Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
