You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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