so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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