I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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