Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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