Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
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