Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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