just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
