can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
