we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
