Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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