Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
