how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
