i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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