once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm like, not good at living.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
