You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
