I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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