Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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