I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
