Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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